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Thursday, January 29, 2004
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SWEDEN, HOME OF THE....HORNY
There are some news stories that are just to perfect to pass by. It's alarming how many of these originate from Scandanavia, too. It would appear that Scandanavia is to sexual deviance what Germany is to genocidal mayhem. See, you can sterotype people by their national origin. Sure, a bunch of busybody lefties will tell you that you can't but they actually mean to say that you shouldn't. Liberals are as bad with language as they are with political ideas.
Which brings me to Sweden. I've long wondered what would happen in to average person's sex drive if they lived in a place where everyone looks the same. Does it intensify due to the inherent narcissism of the human condition? Does it diminish due to internalized feelings of self-loathing? Or does it deviate into something proper people would never acknowledge in a polite society?
If you picked door number three then we have a winner!
This story is wrong on so many different levels that it can't help but feel right. It's also chock full of neat facts that I didn't know before. I'm willing to bet you didn't either. Let's go through them point by point, shall we?
- "Animal sex is not illegal in Sweden, and every year between 200 and 300 pets are injured because of sexual assaults." Wow. Sweden doesn't have that large a population but it appears that a large percentage of it is quite litterally "fucking the pooch." Either that or there's one really horny guy with a LOT of pets. And I always figured that raping your pet was something we could all agree was wrong. I'm a uniter not a divider that way. But I was wrong.
Sweden feels that canine carnal knowledge is a-ok.
-"'We have seen an increase since 1999 when child pornography became illegal", said Johan Beck-Friis."It appears, in other words, as there are some people who have replaced children with animals. In both circumstances, it is sex with defenceless individuals.'"
Child pornography only became illegal in 1999? Jesus, Sweden is wrong in ways I hadn't considered before. Wrong, but apparently versitile. I always thought pedophillia was a very specific kink, kinda like cross-dressing but malignantly evil. But desperation is the father of innovation. I love the image of a guy coming to the conclusion that railing a four year old on videotape is wrong and looking for a replacement kink. "Dammit, I can't fuck the kid anymore and I'm horny. I can't bang an adult because pubic hair freightens me.....here, Spot. Come Spot. God BOY!"
-"In contrast with most other countries, animal sex is not illegal in Sweden. It was decriminalized in 1944 in connection with the decriminalization of homosexual sex."
Again, wow. Let me get this straight; kiddie porn was legal in Sweden but homosexuality wasn't. Although this story does prove Senator Rick Santorum (R-Pennsylvania) wrong. Legitimisizing homosexuality doesn't lead to beastiality, banning child pornography does.
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