The Five Mexican Generals plan: Under Friedman's plan, the border with Mexico would be divided into five sections with one Mexican general responsible for each section. A $1 million trust fund would be created and held in a bank for each general. "When I talk about the five Mexican generals, people think I'm joking but I'm dead serious," said Friedman. "I will divide the border into five jurisdictions, assigning one Mexican general to each and providing a trust fund for that general. Every time a person crosses illegally, we subtract $5,000 from the trust fund." Friedman's plan is intended not only to save money, but to place the responsibility of securing the border on the Mexican government rather than the U.S. government - by giving Mexican military leaders a monetary incentive.
That's a
really interesting idea. So it follows that, under political pressure, Kinky was forced to withdraw it and support the state of Texas' usuriping the United States Constitution by pledging to spend state funds to "protect" an international border. While this saddens me, it doesn't sadden me as much as everybody else in Texas, so I'm still behind Friedman.
I'm also somewhat disappointed in Kinky's drug platform. You would think that someone named "Kinky" would offer something truly revolutionsaary in this field.
Instead, he equivocates.Independent gubernatorial candidate Kinky Friedman called Wednesday for the decriminalization of marijuana to avoid further clogging state prisons with nonviolent offenders.
He also said he would favor a review of people already imprisoned on marijuana charges to "rehab them, try to get them back into society."
That, I'd say, is a pretty good start. Unless of course you'd prefer your prisons populated with potheads rather than pedophiles. Remember that, try as you might to change it, prison space is finite and crime is not. It's
who you punish that really defines you as a people. Or maybe it's just me.
Friedman said he doesn't yet have specifics on how decriminalization would work, including what amount of marijuana a person could possess without being charged. He did say that he doesn't favor making marijuana legally available for purchase.
"I'm not talking about like Amsterdam," he said.
Okay, why not? If you believe that something shouldn't be illegal, why shouldn't it be legal to buy and sell? And if it isn't, aren't you still encouraging a criminal element - and all of its attendant violence and anarchy - through a simple "decrimilization" regime? Even if you have touchy-feely law enforcement, capitalism will still be in play, won't it? Therefore, the underlying social problems of the Drug War will still be there.
"I agree with (U.S. Sen.) John McCain that we've lost the drug war," Friedman said. "Drugs are more available, they're cheaper.
"It's clear to me, if you've lost the war on drugs then you've got to go some other direction. You can't keep banging your head against the wall."
This begs an exploration of what "losing a war" actually means. When the United States surrendered in Vietnam, it didn't mean that the Vietnamese embraced a Swedish form for socialism, they became reactionary commies. And the Marines weren't replaced with a Jeff Spicoli-style sufer team, they were forcibly expelled from the country.
I vaguely remember something about an embassy roof and helicopters. Losing the Drug War means exactly what it implies. And it shouldn't stop with pot.
Unfortunately, Kinky takes this opportunity to descend further into nonsense.
Friedman's comments on marijuana came one week after he created a controversy in Houston when he said the musicians and artists who fled Hurricane Katrina had returned to New Orleans, but the "crackheads and thugs" remained. He later added that many evacuees who remain in Houston are good citizens.
The candidate said Wednesday that crack "is a different deal" from marijuana.
"Marijuana is a very different situation. It's not like crack and (other) drugs that create violence," he said.
I seriously hope that someday that statues will be erected in memory of the ignorance of statements like that. If there's a drug around that "creates violence," that would be alcohol, and it created a whole lot of violence when it was illegal. Perhaps you heard of the Nineteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution that made the Mafia what it is today.
I really didn't want to get too down on Kinky as I endorse him. Honest, I didn't. Yeah, I'm disappointed, but I
do understand that he's running in Texas - the Land That Common Sense Forgot. There are certain political realities that need to be observed in life, even if those realities happen to be retarded. Indeed, it is the total understanding, yea, the embrace, of those realities that makes me the most cynical motherfucker on Al Gore's Interwebs alive today
But I learned as an infant that only a fool holds the good as the enemy of the perfect. But I think that if someone like Kinky Friedman can do well in a place like Texas, it might really
say something to Washington and the political class. I
know that Rick Perry is going to be re-elected. That fact is inescapable. I'd like to believe otherwise, but I'd also like to beleve in other in other nonsense like unicorns, god and love.
If Kinky Friedman comes in a strong second, and raises a true-hell shitload of money, it might send a strong messsage to the rest of country that silly-time is over. But that won't happen, and I couldn't give a shit.
Frankly, I'm too old and too tired to fight much anymore. We're all doomed. There's nothing at all that Kinky Friedman, Bob Dylan, Mojo Nixon, Willie Nelson, Jesus, or I can do about it. If people like us will
never convince our fellow citizens of a fucking thing, why bother trying at all?
And I think that I'm finally comfortable enough with that fact to enjoy the ride. Which brings me back to Clayton Williams - life really is like bad weather and rape.
Easy Listening Recommendation of the Day: Asshole From El Paso By: Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys
From: Old Testaments and New Revelations Permalink
