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Thursday, March 11, 2004
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MAYBE THE MUSLIMS AND JEWS ARE ON TO SOMETHING
Robert Pickton is multi-faceted man. British Columbia pig farmer by day, butcher of prostitutes by night. As things already stand, Pickton, currently charged with 15 counts of first degree murder, may be responsible for upwards of 60. That's a lot of hookers. Pickton is, if convicted, Canada's most prolific serial killer. Yeah, I know, we're way behind in serial killing. But we'll beat your ass at lacrosse.
The beauty of Pickton is that he managed to combine his passions, pig raising and hooker snuffing. You see, there haven't been any actual bodies found on Picton's farm. There have been body parts, very small ones, but most of the remains recovered have been in the form of DNA. Potentially, the DNA of dozens of women.
Let's do the math, shall we? Bone fragments and DNA recovered, but nothing approaching a complete body. On a pig farm. Could it be that Pickton fed the hookers to the swine? Entirely possible, right? Logical conclusion, one would think, correct?
And the RCMP came to the same conclusion that we all just did. The only difference is that the Mounties have been on the goddamn farm for nearly two fucking years! It only occurred to these idiots yesterday to warn the public that "If Robert Pickton gave you any pork products seven years ago and you still have them in your freezer, contact police. You may have been eating crack whore for breakfast."
Jesus Christ, I'm tired of humanity.
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