|
|
Friday, July 23, 2004
|
|
CLEANLINESS: NOW OFFICIALLY MORE CLOSELY ASSOCIATED WITH GODLINESS THAN PREVIOUSLY ASSUMED
From the Desk of Newly Revised Historical Mortality & Ladies Wear
Following this week's revelation of Vladimir Lenin's brave, if brief, struggle with syphilis, comes new, shocking developments from the bowels -as it were - of historical medicine.
Napoleon was killed by an enema.
Now, I understand the need for a sparkling clean asshole as much as the next guy. In fact, I probably go that extra mile. Virtually everybody who has seen mine has been very impressed. In fact, a couple of ladies will to this day swear that they saw their reflection in it. But I'm very dainty.
But would I be willing to give my life for a pretty sphincter. After several days of thoughtful reflection on the matter, I'd have to say that I probably would. I really don't have that much to live for, anyway. Besides, I'm very vain.
|
|
|
| |
