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Wednesday, July 21, 2004
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FROM THE ANNALS OF COMMUNISM
Here's another reason that history is so cool. It's the gift that keeps on giving. You keep learning neat new stuff from it. Stuff like the fact that the founder of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, Vladimir Illych Lenin, died a harrowing and agonizing death from syphilis. How neat is that?
Now, I'm not saying that this should explain everything that went wrong. But it's a hell of a good place to start. It explains super-dopey decisions like keeping Stalin where he was. Lenin knew that Stalin was a monster. Shit, everybody knew that. But Lenin only made his suspicions known in his final political testament, which was only to have been released following his death. Stalin read it before many other people could. Guess what happened? Opps.
The Israeli medical report only describes the effects of syphilis on Lenin in the last two years of his life. However, syphilis works much differently than that. Left untreated, it can destroy the ability to reason decades before death occurs. This could very well mean that the very establishment of the "worker's paradise" could have been predicated on a syphlictic fantasy. This has been something that I've been saying in public for years, and is something that I once suggested to the Soviet Union's deputy ambassador to Canada in 1989. I was ....precoucious in high school.
But its really nice to finally have scientific proof of it. Even better, I'll probably only have to wait unti November to be vindicated in my belief that John Kerry is a syphlitic monster.
None of this is really the point of this post, though. The news of Lenin's condition gave the excuse to play the game you've all been awaiting the return of,
THE ENJOY EVERY SANDWICH "WHO LOOKS MORE LIKE A SYPHLITIC MONSTER?" GAME
Sectretary General of the Soviet Communist Party, Vladimir Lenin
Or unemployable Canadian shithead, skippystalin
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