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Friday, July 09, 2004
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"IS THERE ANYTHING HE WON'T LIE ABOUT?"
This could become a regular feature of this blog, "Trivial Shit Michael Moore Is Incapable Of Telling The Truth About." Yesterday, we addressed Moore's accusations toward the shockingly irrelevant Pete Townshend. Today, I'd like to explore Moore's fantasies involving the devastatingly handsome Senate Minority Leader, Tom Daschle.
Moore says they embraced tenderly at the Washington premiere of his "documentary", Fahrenheit 9/11. In all seriousness, I can't fault him for this. Have you seen Daschle?
Jesus, what a sexy motherfucker. Oh, that guy on the left is John Kerry. He's running for president. Maybe you've heard of him. It's odd just how many truth-deficient people feel the need to touch Senator Daschle. He's like that tree stump at the Apollo for liars.
Now, I can't blame Moore for dreaming of touching Daschle. Especially now that we've demonstrated his sexual intensity. I'm only glad that Barry White isn't alive to see his mantle taken by a South Dakotan dwarf. There's only one problem with the story. Daschle says it never happened.
I can kind of understand why, too. Poor Tom is in a tight re-election race back home. As Senate Minority Leader, he is also the highest ranking elected Democrat in all of Christendom. For him too lose would be embarrassing. And to become known as the rabbit's foot of pathological liars across America might not help in his campaign.
Could Daschle be lying about this, instead of the big, sweaty propagandist? Yeah, he could be. But since you'd be hard pressed to find Moore telling the truth about anything, I'll tend to believe Daschle.
This is getting fun, isn't it? It could be a game for the whole family, "Watch Michael Fib."
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