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Monday, February 07, 2005
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HAPPINESS IS A WARM CREDIT CARD
Unlike the lovely Sadie, I don't have the adverse relationship with Monday's that she does. Sadie's relationship with Mondays can only be described as Geldof-esque. Mine is rather enjoyable. Monday is my day off most weeks. Actually, it's my only day off. Monday is also my payday. This brings me unimaginable joy as it allows me to spend money that I don't really have.
After a year of somewhat spotty employment, I have finally managed to get my credit card back in line. this facilitates further spending of money that I don't really have. I'm sure you all recognize the joy that this brings my otherwise broken heart. Well, the occasional chest and shoulder pains lead me to believe that I'm either suffering from a broken heart or I'm about to have a giant coronary.
As you can imagine, this requires constant distractions.
So, let's get to the spending, shall we?
First, I went to the bookstore where I picked up "All the President's Spin: George W. Bush, the Media and the Truth" by the editors of Spinsanity.com. You can imagine what the subject of this tome is. I also bought "The Dark Side: The Personal Price of a Political Life" by Steve Paikin. Mr. Paikin theorizes that politics destroys everything human about its practitioners and that this is negative. I share the theory, however, I feel it is positive. Things that destroy a person's humanity should be encouraged. After all, not everyone can have my love life.
My final bookstore selection was "The Persian Puzzle: The Conflict Between Iran and America" by Kenneth M. Pollack. Mr. Pollack's second book, "The Threatening Storm: The Case for Invading Iraq" was influential in my support for the subsequent war. I have any number of things to say about Iranian/ American relations. As a matter of fact, I attempted to do so this morning, but Blogger ate my post. I shall endeavour to try again when the rage subsides.
Of course, man cannot live on smart boy reading alone. Accordingly, I then went to buy something special. That would be "Oz: the Fourth Season" on DVD. I strongly feel that Oz is the greatest program in the history of television and have so advised everyone dear to me. Oz is beautiful for two reasons; firstly, it is brilliantly written and fantastically acted. The cast is incredible. Secondly, Oz is, if nothing else, a play on the meaning of love. At first, you're new and lonely and love gives you a carton of cigarettes when you need one. Then, without warning, its holding a shank to your throat whilst it relentlessly fucks you in the ass. Before you know it, you're strung out on opiates, dressed in drag and singing torch songs for the other prisoners.
I also got a big case of beer so I can drink myself into a blind stupor as I enjoy my purchases. Hey, betcha didn't know I was such a fun guy, did you?
Anyway, I haven't forgotten my pledge to descreibe the effect that depression has on my libido. I'll probably post that later - when I'm good and drunk. I might even write it in the context of my first porno review. I'm thinking of writing regular porno reviews. If I can, I'd like to make Enjoy Every Sandwich as versitile as possible. Can you think of another blog that will give you a serious trestise on Middle Eastern politics and reviews of fuck movies, all in one spot? I don't think you can. I want to be your one stop shopping experience.
Now I need to get drunk enough that I feel human again.
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