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Friday, April 15, 2005
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ASK skippy, PART SEVENTEEN
Now, I'm pretty big on armchair psychoanaysis. Ordinarily, I'm on the delivering side as opposed to the recieving end. That's part of the reason that I was so thrilled to get this e-mail from Chris F. not 20 minutes ago.
Please seek professional (real, accredited professional, not what you claim to be) medical attention. You need help, the sooner you realize this the less likely you are to lose your obviously fragile distinction between fantasy and reality and hurt someone (else?).
Woweee! A caring stranger. Who'dve thunk it. Someone who knows absolutely nothing about me other than what I write on a largely satirical blog is telling me that I'm nuts. At least I assume that this judgement is based on my blog. I don't know a Chris F. personally, and the subject line of his e-mail said "Your blog", so I would think that this is a reasonable assumption.
That the e-mail came in the middle of what was promising to be a conversation of potentially monumental personal importance to me actually didn't even bother me as much as it should have. This is because I LOVE being analyzed by strangers. It feeds my narcissim and fuels the resentment that you've all come to love mostabout me.
Don't get me wrong, I do it here all the time. I read posts and make a diagnosis based soley on what I see on the screen. Usually though, I actually cite what I'm passing judgement on and blockquote my evidence. Chris hasn't done that, so I'm at something of a loss here. As to my "fragile distinction between fantasy and reality", I'm not sure to what Chris refers. It might be my several allusions to the fabled "Bush / Cheney '04" cock ring (which sadly, does not exist) or it could be something else. We might never know.
My personal favorite part of the e-mail is the end. The "and hurt someone (else?)," part was troubling. I'm pretty sure that I've never revealed where the bodies are buried on my blog, although this does call for re-checking the archives. I may have let something slip. Again, Chris F. is non-secific, and if there's anything that I demand from my readers, it's specificity. I'm a tyrant that way.
In any event, I look forward to hearing from Chris F. again. Maybe he/she can provide some specific citations to my mental illness. I think that would be fun for the whole family.
And who knows? Maybe Chris F. can be best friends with Justice Scalia and I soon.
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